The Wagon of Choice

I have begun to consciously choose an intention everyday to begin my day. I have been through a few like “choosing not to judge; be with; non-reactive etc”. But, there is one that works specially well with me. It is the choice of self-observant.

When I choose to self-observe, I really try hard to be aware of what is going on within me when I receiving from without. Or how I am  reacting to things that are happening around me and to me. I suppose it is like imagining observing myself as a 3rd person. I remember when I was a younger man, I used to practice a form of self-observant. Back then, it was about being conscious of how I present myself physically to the world. It was all about the external. Now, it is more about what is going on inside my head that prompts my reactions toward what is going on outside. In this space, I get to choose my path of action.

It could be as simple as catching myself judging others or participating on a trail of hot gossip. From here I get to choose if I want to continue on or switch direction. If I decided to continue judging, then I make the conscious decision on doing so but bear in mind that what I think may not be true. There are other truths that I am not accessing yet. Then I realized that this is so damn exhausting that I might as well stop judging and just be with.

A friend of mine wrote me about her daughter’s experience of conscious choosing. Her daughter’s horse was ill and she was very upset about it. Her horse had lumps in its neck, and she called vet, but was fussing about it. Then she said to her daughter, “Well you’ve done everything you can do, so now you have a choice of making yourself miserable or not”. Her daughter thought about it and then smiled.

I am beginning to feel that CHOICES is the mother lode of the cavern of happiness!


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